Intimacy, 11 Ways to Create a Genuine Connection when it Fades

Intimacy, 11 Ways to Create a Genuine Connection when it Fades

Intimacy, What if I told you that you and your partner can become even closer to each other without even making love? I assume that you will disagree and immediately think: “Wait! What could be more intimate than physical intimacy? Doesn’t this forbidden fruit – the sweetest and most desirable – unite two loving people more strongly than anything else in the world?”

The truth is that lovemaking and intimacy are not the same thing. And one of them is truly key and determining in creating long-term and successful relationships.

Libido can’t just go off the charts for years. At the beginning of a relationship, you really get turned on even by the mere thought of your partner. But several months or years pass and sexual desire “stabilizes.” Note that this does not mean that you are moving away from each other or are tired of each other. This is a normal natural process that all couples go through.

After the hot first phase of the relationship, the next one begins – calmer. This is exactly the stage when it is not at all necessary to enter into physical intimacy in order to feel intimacy and close connection. You still have fun and pleasure with your loved one, although you may be in funny and ridiculous pajamas in the bedroom. This does not make your partner any less close or attractive.

When you lie with your partner on the couch and chat about everything in the world, remember something, discuss some important things, dream, laugh – in such moments the bonds are created that form a happy marriage. And this happens every day.

In this case, physical intimacy occurs with a frequency that satisfies both partners. No one argues that sexual intimacy is very important for a successful relationship, but it alone cannot be its foundation. Intimacy is the key to true happiness between two people.

Is it a lazy libido, or is something else connecting people?

The fact that physical intimacy in a relationship becomes less over time does not mean that libido has faded away forever and “love is leaving.” Yes, you may no longer make love every day or at every meeting, but this does not in any way affect intimacy and your feelings.

On the contrary, you discover after a pleasant and sincere conversation that you still remain attractive and desirable to your partner. After all, this creates a strong and deep emotional connection. Your libido is fine, don’t worry. You just open a new stage in a relationship – you discover that you are overwhelmed with love and admiration for your partner, even without physical intimacy.

Couples who are literally fixated on sex and don’t pay attention to anything else are at great risk. When there is simply a lack of emotional intimacy – genuine admiration, respect, tenderness, kisses, affection, hugs, it is quite naive to count on a long-term relationship.

In fact, what many are really looking for is true intimacy that extends beyond the bedroom. Those who are in successful and happy relationships, I am sure, understand what I mean.

Are you satisfied?

Couples who lack emotional intimacy may initially be happy with everything and even delight them, until one day one of their partners (or both) suddenly discovers to their surprise that, in fact, nothing connects them.

To prevent this from happening to you, watch the dynamics of the development of relationships. Pay attention to the days when you are not physically intimate – do you continue to communicate as partners or practically do not notice each other?

Carefully evaluate your feelings after the honeymoon period has passed. How have they changed?

Just don’t deceive yourself and don’t be afraid to face the truth. On a scale of 10, rate how satisfying your relationship is.

Then identify those things (eg communication, support, time spent together, affection) that are missing.

And only after that, choose the right time for a heart-to-heart talk with your partner. Under no circumstances should you start it when you are under stress, or worse, during a quarrel. A conversation will only be constructive if both of you are committed to it. That’s when you can voice everything and discuss how you can meet each other’s needs.

If you stop spending a lot of time in the bedroom and there is no genuine intimacy, then this causes serious dissatisfaction in the relationship. When you are emotionally completely disconnected from each other, then jumping into bed only makes everything worse. Especially for those who are looking for real intimacy. This is how it works, and you have to take it into account.

The good news is that relationships can be saved and sent in the right direction. True, you won’t succeed if you sit with your hands folded. You’ll have to take action, and here are some tips to help you reset your relationship.

11 things that will help you get closer:

  • Take a walk through the city at night, holding hands.
  • Give each other a 10-minute massage before bed.
  • Sit on a small rug in the park so that you have to press closely together.
  • Send a playful message to your partner that you are preparing a surprise, but don’t explain what it is. Or simply write how much you love and value your spouse.
  • No matter how tired you are after work, don’t immediately fall exhausted onto your pillows and fall asleep. Talk for at least 20 minutes before going to bed.
  • Think about your first date or the first time you became intimate.
  • Cook dinner while dancing to music in the kitchen.
  • Spend four minutes continuously looking into each other’s eyes without saying a word. Then discuss how it made you feel.
  • Exercise as a couple – “couples that sweat together, stay together.”
  • Remember what gave you “butterflies in your stomach” at the beginning of the relationship, and try to repeat this experience.
  • Every night, no matter how the day went, thank your partner for the good things he has done for you. Even if it’s something tiny. At the same time, be sure to indicate specifically why you are saying a sincere “thank you.” For example, for washing the dishes, bringing food for dinner, sending a message with words of love, a morning kiss before leaving for work, etc.

While intimacy promotes the chemistry of love, don’t forget that it’s not about rocket science! Tell your partner what turns you on and what you like. It’s amazing how much you can do for each other with just a hug or a hand on a hip.

Remember often the pleasant moments in the past and constantly plan for the future that you look forward to together. Intimacy is impossible without tenderness and care.

Don’t forget to communicate

Communication is, of course, the foundation of true intimacy. After all, your partner is not a telepath and cannot read minds. So you can convey to him what you want and need – only with the help of words. Just like letting him know that he is loved and dear.

At the same time, it is important to learn not only to listen, but also to hear. Only in this case will communication be real and two-way. Remember the last time you talked to each other, putting your phones aside and looking into each other’s eyes? Quite often we talk casually, while looking at our Facebook feed, our favorite TV program, or doing something else.

It’s very simple: if there is intimacy outside the bedroom, then it will be in the bedroom too! So don’t skimp on tenderness and care. And remember: you can always fix everything. Get started today!

About the author

Official Street Blogger

A talented writer whose captivating stories explore the depths of human emotion and experience. With a unique blend of elegance and authenticity, TheStreetBlogger's work sparks conversations, challenges norms, and inspires empathy. Their dedication to storytelling illuminates the power of words to unite and uplift us all. TheStreetBlogger; "Where Streets Speak and Stories Unfold"

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